I want to start by clarifying that when I say “rock concert” I mean small shows with local and touring independent bands. The kind of shows you would see in a bar or club. If you go to an arena show, your after party gets stuck in traffic, so have fun with that. Your goal here is to party and befriend real rock stars and it is in the most intimate settings that it will happen.

Then you find your show and the band takes the stage. Now is the time to let go and have fun. Yell and yell, dance, clap, and yell words of encouragement between songs. “You guys are cool!” etc. The wilder the crowd, the better the musicians will have a good time. When you show up after the set, the band will remember you as someone who really left and will instantly like you.

When the band finishes playing, they will have two things in mind. Lie down and get drunk. If you are an attractive and calm person, you may be invited to offer sex. If you’re lazy like me, you might want to try alcohol. Offer to buy a round of beers. Be prepared and say “Hey guys, I have a pot of hookers (18-pack) in my car. Where’s the party?” Some musicians may be looking for drugs. I speak from experience when I say that drugs are very dangerous and you don’t want to get involved with them at all. Don’t serve an eight ball or someone could end up dead or institutionalized.

Always be nice after a concert and thank the band personally. A quick way to find the after party is to simply ask. It may be at a bar down the street that serves harder and cheaper drinks. If this is the case, just follow the crowd.

Not all bands have the ability to have a house party after a show. If you have an empty, well-stocked house, you can always offer to host the after-party at your house. Just make sure the neighbors are quiet because it could be loud and noisy. Also save the fragile things because their place could be destroyed! If your house is big enough, you might even be able to convince your new musician friends to play a show at home.

This last tip is what got me to all the after parties. If you have the equipment, videotape the entire program. The musicians are self-conscious and will want to know if they killed him on stage or if they did it wrong. Bring your cables and let them know that you can plug them into your TV and let them watch the whole show. You will be a hero and an instant friend.

Use these tips and you’ll be partying with rock stars in no time. Some of the friends you make might even become trade associations if you have an interest in show business. I had the best time of my life and I bet you will too.