For a plus size woman, it’s not easy living in our quick fix, thinness driven by the media, society obsessed with dieting, pluck and fit, cut and drop. Most women struggling with excess weight find themselves locked in a private body war, playing body comparison games with every girl they see. Almost certain that they have drawn the shortest stick, they feel miserable with themselves. This manifests in obsession with food and weight, “not being in the mood”, feeling overwhelmed by mental and/or physical clutter, “doormat syndrome”, avoiding social activities, fear of intimacy, low sexual desire, trust issues, risk avoidance, and a general lack of trust, not to mention how it undermines the foundation of the entire family.

With their body image in tatters and self-image frayed to exhaustion, many successful and powerful women suffer in silence resentful of their mirrors, fearing their scales and hating their bodies, wishing they were slimmer. Research shows that nearly 4 in 5 American American women today say they hate their bodies. That’s 80% of the female population in the entire United States. You are one of them? If so, I have a great body image blast for you!

60 Minute Personal Makeover – Lifetime Reality TV, “How to Look Good Naked”

Good news, America! Lifetime Television has a fabulous and successful reality series called “How to Look Good Naked” (HTLGN) Originally created in the UK, it became a dizzying success and made its way to the US Enter Carson Kressley, an outspoken hairstylist man professional and fashion designer to the stars. He is a former co-host of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy and an actor whose delightfully playful attitude and approach to empowering women and training them to love their bodies make him the perfect host for Lifetime’s new show Take it from me, girl. This is a 60 minute personal makeover that is guaranteed to make you tingle inside, because it will make you question all the irrational beliefs you have about your body.

It focuses on creating an inner transformation by guiding women to see themselves differently and allowing them to shed their old negative images of themselves, fat and ugly. When I saw the show I was moved to tears. Feeling inspired to share the women’s stories with my readers, I contacted several of the show’s contributors (nominees) and asked to interview them.

The plan for the show is that, over the course of 5 days, each woman will learn how to dress to flatter her body type, find the right undergarment base to give her a great shape, and apply makeup and hair for maximum impact. Each episode celebrates the transformation with a glamorous Hollywood-style photo shoot in which women not only accept what they see in the mirror, but put it on display naked.

In my opinion, these women are true role models and incredibly brave for being willing to appear on national television and share so much of themselves, opening up and exposing their vulnerabilities, letting other women know that they are not alone. To inspire and encourage my readers, I have included their interviews in my upcoming book, Lovin’ the Skin You’re In. The following is an excerpt from Shannon’s story:

So many sighs about her big fat thighs – “I was so embarrassed to be seen in a bathing suit.” -Shannon

Shannon Flores is 29 years old. She is a beautiful, curvaceous plus size woman who lives in sunny California with her husband Jeremy and her four children, Ryan, Samantha, Kaitlyn and Kyra. Although she has a pool in her backyard, before she was in HTLGN, she never used to enjoy it because she was embarrassed that her husband or her neighbors would see her in a swimsuit. After having four kids, back to back, she says, “my chest just sagged. My hips got bigger. My thighs got bigger. My butt got bigger. It seemed like every part of my body was falling apart, and it’s not fun.” what babies do to your body.

Keeping tightly closed in a box

Like so many other women, as a busy wife and mother, Shannon put everyone else before herself. Hiding behind oversized, monotonous and boring mom clothes, she refused to spend money on anything new, hoping to lose weight one day. Mocked by her own negative self-talk for years, Shannon tortured herself by focusing on her imperfections. Eschewing mirrors, bathing suits, and anything that reveals her curvy body, Shannon admits she’s not as physical with her husband as she’d like, saying, “It definitely messed up our relationship. And with the lights off, I was still uncomfortable. ” Her keeping hermetically sealed in a box. She knew that she was not actually alive and she admitted to being embarrassed and disgusted with her body, not wanting her husband to see her really naked. So she nominated herself to be on the show.

The transformation

In our interview, Shannon candidly shared with me, “When they posted that picture of my body on that truck and they asked everyone, ‘What do you see? Do you see? None of them said, “You know she’s perfect. She has the body of a model. Because I don’t. But they pointed out the good things. Look at her eyes. Look at the color of her skin. Look at this. Look at that.” “. And I started realizing, I’m not that bad. My body is more than my thighs. That’s not the point everyone is looking at.” So I started to realize that I need to start seeing life that way too. I need to start looking at all the positive things, even if they are small. I just need to point them out and start concentrating on them more.”

Shannon now enjoys her pool at least twice a week, whether it’s swimming or sunbathing, saying, “I don’t care. I walk around my front yard in my bathing suit. Life is too short to worry.” because of what other people do.” think of me After gaining back 30 of the 60 pounds she lost on Weight Watchers, following the birth of her last child, she says, “I’m pretty good. I feel great. I look good and I’m not going to put any more effort into trying to lose When I asked her what her special advice was for women who are now where she was before, she said, “Be good with who you are right now, right now.”

Here are some fashion tips that Shannon shared with me and a few extras from the How to Look Good Naked website. Follow these tips if you want more curves and confidence at any size:

be bold – Try everything on. If you see something you like, take a risk and try it on. You’ll never know what you’re missing if you get stuck in the same rut.

educate yourself – Look for clothes on women with your shape that you admire. Watch shows like How to Look Good Naked and What Not to Wear for ideas on how to shop for clothes to accentuate and highlight your body type.

Piece by piece Build a closet of separate garments. Just like renovating a house, shopping is a process. It is always a work in progress.

accentuate the positive Carson suggested highlighting a small waist and large hips, by wearing fitted jackets that tie around the waist and, for short women like Shannon, aim for jackets that just cover the hips or are shorter.

For hourglass figures – Wear a wrap dress to accentuate your curves, knee-high boots with jeans will add more length to your body and balance out your curvy hips. To define a small waist, choose fitted V-neck shirts.

For plus size women – Choose monochrome outfits to create a long and slender effect. Wear skirts that taper and then flare at the hem to balance you out. Draw attention to the center of your body by wearing sparkly tops under jackets. Try on clothes of different shapes and colors.

For a bust with Bam! – To complement your curves and create balance, wear scoop necks to draw attention away from the bust, high armholes on jackets to create a more balanced and slim silhouette, and wear delicate necklaces that end just above the neckline.

for big arms – Wear open neck wrap tops to enhance the neckline and waist area. Three-quarter sleeves show only the thinnest part of the arm. Jackets with puffed shoulders make armholes easier for a roomier fit.

For full fannied girls – Buy fitted jackets that end just above the widest part of the leg. Wear tops in bright colors with beautiful details to draw the eye up. Avoid jeans with small back pockets that will make your butt look bigger. Wear low belts to create the illusion of a smaller butt. Choose A-line skirts with a natural waist to flatter your figure.

To learn more about this fabulous and fun 60 minute personal makeover, I invite you to watch the show. If you can’t find it on your local listings, run don’t walk and go directly to http://www.carsonkressley.com You can download full episodes on iTunes. There are also some that you can watch for free.